Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Liveblogging A Daily Show Interview with Jonah "Pantload" Goldberg

Jonah: I iz a liar.
Jon Stewart: You're a cobag and actively hurting America.
Jonah: I iz a rhetorician.
Jon Stewart: Your kind killed Socrates, cobag.
Jonah: I iz kinda lazy.
Jon Stewart: Progressive does not mean racist.
Jonah: I iz a lying, lazy rhetorician who writed a stupid book that pays no attention to factz because I not like reading. Can I haz a cheezburger nao?
Jon Stewart: Shaking your hand is not an excusal of your rampant cobaggery.

And now I go back to not watching television in solidarity with the writers.

Addendum: I kinda wish I was working at a video store and Jonah Goldberg wandered in looking to rent some porn. Of course, his idea of porn is probably something like this, so...

"Free Market Classical Liberalism"...what the fuck? He is just sitting there saying, "Don't call me a fascist because I don't like being called a word that I don't know and won't look up."


Anonymous said...

That sounds like yet another reason I'm glad not to have cable.

and it makes me want a cheezburger.


Anonymous said...

You should have always been watching television in solidarity with the writers!

Sometimes I think you set yourself up for disappointment.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

If Jonah said "OH HAI. WIL DESTROI YU" the only response would be to fall down laughing.

He truly came across as Pantload. I particularly like the opening, where he admitted openly that he stole the title and cover for his book; also the ending, Stewart looking at the camera and asking plaintively "Can we air ANY of this?"

It seems that the majority of it was Jonah throwing f-bombs because Jon wouldn't play along.

Snag said...

It would have been sad if Jonah wasn't such a dick.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Oddly, Snag, I didn't have any sad feelings at all.

I laughed all the way through.

Jonah's an overfed, overbred pompous overprivileged mama's boy trustafarian with a second rate education and a third rate intellect as well as the thinnest skin in politics.

His greatest failing, though, is in not realizing that he is these things. He totally beleives that he has written an epic historical treatise, and it is only a matter of time before he becomes a scholarly luminary.

I'll wager he hasn't been at ease since venturing beyond the sandbox.

Any other adult would not have come across so poorly. even dick Cheney comes across more sympathetic in interviews. Hell, Jon Stewart manages to make McCain look non-insane and warm.

Anonymous said...

You better knock that shit off.

Chuckles said...

What BP said.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

I canNOT believe the Sadlies haven't been all over this interview today.

I think they might all be sitting in their living rooms, driven into comas by the shock that JONAH JUST VALIDATED EVERY THING THAT HAD EVER BEEN SAID ON THEIR SITE ABOUT HIM.

Chuckles said...

I expected to see something on Sadly, No! about this, too.

Anonymous said...

I am willing to pay whoever can get me the unedited footage of the interview. What a complete ass. I thought that John Bolton was the ├╝ber-tool, but he was nothing compared to Jonah.

Chuckles said...

I hereby pledge $100 to the Unedited Jonah Goldberg Interview Fund.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Sadly, No is ensured material forevah.

Chuckles said...

Also, if The Great Unwashed Pantload attempted to threaten me, I'd full on pimpslap him. None of this "calm down" shit.

I'd then roll up a newspaper, shove his face in his book, hit him over the head and yell, "NO! Bad cobag!"