So one of my brothers and I were sitting around my parent's kitchen a few months ago when the phone rang. It was a telemarketer calling to ask if we would fill out a survey and pay the shipping charges to have some "Girls Gone Wild" DVDs shipped out to us. I replied with:
FG(Freelance Genius): "I had a friend in college that ordered some DVDs from you guys and his card was ripped off and the DVDs he received were blank. How can I trust you now?"
TM: In a deep, easygoing voice, "Would you like to speak to our security company, they are the ones that handle the credit card collection and processing? It is totally secure now. Online security has been increased dramatically since your friend had those troubles."
FG: "No thanks, I really don't want to give my card out over the phone..."
TM: "I am sure you know the Girls Gone Wild videos from TV, you know what a bargain this is for filling out a survey and paying just the postage-"
FG: "yeah, I know the videos, but I am not too sure right now, how about you just send over some girls? Girls who are going wild? That would be ok."
TM: Stifling a laugh, "You want me to send some girls over to your house? Uhh, how about you give me your information and I'll sign you up for the DVDs and then we'll talk about sending some girls over to your house."
At this point, my brother starts cracking up, as do I.
FG: "No thanks, I really just want the girls, the girls who are going wild."
TM: Getting a little flustered, "These videos have it all, you know..."
FG: "Oh, I know, I've seen the commercials, that's why i was hoping you could send these girls over to my house."
FG: "Thanks anyway, I guess."
TM: Hangs up.
Get off the five hitter and get back to work!
I am starting to rethink my whole position on that substance. I have a job with benefits that rock the house and a decent salary and place to live for a while. I suppose it would be okay at a party, but not in any situation like the infamous summer in Portland. The entire state was on fire and so was I.
Infamous summer in Portland? You owe us some 411. Start splain' Lucy.
It isn't all that much to say anyway...well, yes it is. Tomorrow, sweet attack chica, tomorrow...
They called me too last year. I wish I could have come up with a witty come back...damn. I just hung up.
I can be witty enough for a few people. Or maybe not.
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