To Be Added to the List of Super Gross People: Grocery Bathroom Guy

I was recently in a grocery and store, and I decided to use the bathroom while Lady Chemistry was looking at some items.  There was a guy using the other urinal when I walked in, and I walked over to the other urinal.  As I am unzipping, the dude finishes, flushes, and strolls out.  I glanced at the door, and then the sinks.  He cruised right past Go, did not collect his $200, did not wash his hands, and went out into the store.  A grocery store.  Which has food.  Which he may have touched.  With hands that were just shaking his pee pee.

How do I know he shook his pee pee, you might be asking yourself.  He did that lean back and shoulder shake thing that means he was shaking his wiener and flinging the last drops of urine everywhere, including, most probably, his hands and pants.

Mister Pee Pee Hands, you win.  I officially hate Virginia again.  Thanks for ruining the small pleasures I had cultivated in this formerly mediocre state. 

New Week, New Apartment, Same Shit All Over the Sidewalk

I have finished moving and just need a few days to get all my crap sorted and stacked in piles that would make a paranoid schizophrenic weep. Someday, I might even host some people at the Nu Chez Wang.

Work progresses apace. Yadayadayda.

People still refuse to clean up after their dogs but the recent snows have helped me avoid these canine deposited land mines. Unfortunately, the snow and ice have made it all the more apparent that this is a neighborhood endorsed insurrection. The sheer number and volume of the deposits indicate a wide spread and coordinated attack on the sole of America. I have also uncovered evidence that this movement is spreading over sidewalks in other areas of DC.

Thursday night, I was walking a new acquaintance to the Dupont Circle Metro station after Drinking Liberally and we were accosted by an unaccompanied large dog. There were no obvious owners/caretakers/co-conspirators nearby and I commented on the flagrant violation of the leash law. The acquaintance admitted to trepidation in meeting new dogs without leashes. I then commented on the difficulties in cleaning up after an unleahed dog and the smelly situation in my neighborhood. The acquaintance then replied with rather a surprising amount of venom and wit, "That is fucking filthy. Jesus, what the hell? It's not like people are free to herd goats on the street or raise chickens and let them shit all over the place!"

I expressed similar outrage and a desire to make the offending owners suffer an unpleasantly foul experience. The acquaintance and I had a couple laughs at the situation and agreed to meet a later date to discuss plans and strategy.

This conversation reminded me of the pigs that some people in Bucharest would raise on the porches of their apartments. Every now and then, a pedestrian would be forced to dodge a brief shower of porcine fecal matter. Chickens were also a frequent sight on a Romanian balcony.