Failures Abound and Spirits Sag, Yet Hope Remains

While trekking to our destination yesterday, we encountered another well-equipped expedition. A large family group of Illinoian travellers was participating in a cartographic survey of the peninsula. My logistical director was acquainted with one of the porters in the other group. They had both attended explorer's university in their youth. I instructed my colleague to reaffirm this friendship and glean any information on the natural phenomenon of the area. We have yet to locate any further varieties of New Glarus, spotted or dappled, or any of the greater or lesser Sprecher's species.

The leader of the cartographic surveyors and I discussed the fascinating wildlife and the trophies I had hoped to triumphantly bring back to the museum, we enjoyed a light juniper beverage liberally spiked with gin and tonic. I expressed my disappointment with the local villagers' porting ability. They are rather weak of spirit. My compatriot feels that these trips are best left to family and then proceeded to describe his rather boring genealogy and the names of his descendants whom he had relegated to baggage and portage duty. The man had many faults but chief among them was a completely insufficient knowledge of firearms. Not everyone I meet is prepared for the difficulties of a life spent forging a solitary path through the wilds with only a team of local porters, a doctor, three nurses, two naturalists, a tracker and three horse thieves.

The logistical directer returned with some new knowledge of our earlier stated destination on the northern and eastern beaches. The region has been decimated by the drought and is no longer a fertile ground for man or animal. The water level has receded to the point that the beaches are covered in a mass of rotten vegetation and decaying fish. I have found the fish in this region to be rather poor in quality on the whole with the notable exception of the walled-eye fish, a curious piscine prevalent in much of the waters inland. Unfortunately, it is not much sport for a true explorer.

Today, we have resigned ourselves to a day of rest as our porters have become exhausted in the unusual heat. I am not normally disposed to such molly-coddling of my guides and muleskinners, but there are local sites in the southern peninsula which I plan to visit, with or without a full bar and ammunition selection.

One note of information that is startling and speaks volumes of the skill of our Doctor Chetworth P. Hunnicobble, none of our gangly local porters have yet fallen ill to the virulent ear ifnections this region has been known for in past travels. I am certain that the constitutions of these people would be barely capable of this trip were it not for the over-tender ministrations of Dr. Hunnicobble.