Friday, August 24, 2007

Brew at the Zoo Verdict: Needs New Billing and More Food

In terms of meeting ladies, I would say that the Brew at the Zoo was a bit of a bust, except for the lovely Lisa and Sarah with an H. It was fun talking with them but it was not fun talking to a pretty Australian and hooking her up with pilfered, line-skipped food only to meet her boyfriend. Note to the person who told me it was a singles event: YOU LIE. There were more married couples of all ages than single ladies. I did meet one woman who worked for the WWF1 who did not know that it was a benefit for that organization. That was amusing.2

It felt like only one third of the tents had food and this was pretty poor planning. The lines for the barbecue sandwiches was 40 minutes long and I was not going to waste my time with that. I did make my way to the front of the Magic Hat line twice because I thought their beer was good and they were giving away goofy condoms. I was hungry and the carrot cake3, while good, was not enough to satisfy me. I wanted something hearty to fight the vaporous beer within.

We were apparently not supposed to roam around and look at the empty animal enclosures. Not even the Prairie Dogs were interested in the party.

1 Sadly, not the World Wrestling Foundation.

2 Not amusing? Her friend who blatantly thought I was sketchy.

3 From Open City.

13 comments:

porterhouse said...

It sounded like there was much potential in a singles night at the zoo. Guess they have a different definition of "singles"

Chuckles said...

Yeah, single shots of beer.

dontEATnachos said...

I guess the important thing here is that you didn't get drunk enough to climb into the bear cage, remove all of your clthes, and then get eaten.

Which really sounds like a good bear mauling might have thinned out the barbecue sandwich line.

billy pilgrim said...

I once saw the Violent Femmes at the Zoo.

The animals seemed to like it.

don't think we did an audience count, so who knows how many the moose might have eaten.

Chuckles said...

Yeah, I poked the bear and spit on a cheetah but the park police wouldn't let me streak.

missy&chrissy said...

what a letdown.

i can't believe they didn't let you roam around to see all the animals...don't they know that pointing out a baby panda hanging out in the foliage is the way to a girl's heart?

Kathleen said...

bummer. it sounded like an event with lots of potential coolness.

what, praytell, is a 'goofy condom'?

Chuckles said...

You'll see, Kathleen, you'll see.

Adorable said...

It's because you didn't show the wang. That and you probably wore your bacon t-shirt or vagina shirt. That never goes well with the ladies.

Guess you'll have to wait until October.

Wah. Wah.b

Dandrobium said...

Ha! I'm glad someone he respects is telling him to ditch the stu... lame? t-shirts.

Chuckles said...

I was wearing a good shirt, jeans and nice shoes. No t-shirt.

I was sporting a mild Burt, though.

Lindsey said...

We had a singles thing at the Zoo here a couple of years ago. Not allowed to go back. ;o( lol

billy pilgrim said...

Yeah, if you had been sporting a Full Frito t-shirt they would have let you fondle the farm animals.

No kidding though, they probably were just worried that Snag would show up hungry and they'd wind up a couple of moose short.