Wednesday, December 20, 2006

High Expectations UPDATED

Shit and double shit. I am normally a fairly witty and snappy sort of talker. This ability does not slip away from me in most situations, even when it would be helpful. Now, I find myself in a situation where the woman I am meeting has high expectations for wit and banter and all I can think about is that she likes me and likely wants to get freaky.

I know you can't see it, but I just drifted off there for like five minutes. My brain has more trains of thought than Perdido Street Station and most of them derail when I drift like this. Anyway, I have just now decided that I must approach this situation like I approach any situation that doesn't require power tools, construction, skills I don't possess, tools I don't possess or automobiles: without any planning or forethought. Jump in with both feet or headfirst and swim if you can. Improvise. It has mostly worked so far. Except in that Calculus class. And some interviews.

UPDATE 2:25PM 12/20/06: I have just been informed that I performed a classic Hollywood Gambit in order to win the attentions of the fair, fiery, redheaded maiden in question. Dear lord, I am officially a cliche.

8 comments:

Adorable Girlfriend said...

Chuckles appears to have a 12 days of Christmas theme going on here. The p value on some of it is sadly low. AG shall refrain from bashing the holiday cheer.

And by cheer, we all know what AG means.

Chuckles said...

googleplex.

fulsome said...

I like how AG is using "p value" like that is the relevant statistical terminology. Just because you read it in a paper doesn't mean it gets to become the next "n=" phrase.

Kevin Wolf said...

Only a spectator here, but so far the Genius rocks. Yeah, just go with the off the cuff wit. Why the hell not?

Chuckles said...

Can't how my life could get any worse!

porterhouse said...

Wait until you open the gifts I bring for you. It will get worse!

Alex said...

Chuck, here's my Christmas present for you.

To batter a Faith No More line: "Don't you act so surprised/Merry Christmas...FUCKER!"

mdhatter said...

coffee

drink coffee

just drink coffee

or beer.