Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Ladies, Please, I Didn't Pay for Dinner Because

If I don't have enough to pay for dinner, at least I didn't insist we go out or even that we see each other again. Honestly, I'm only interesting on the internet. Can you imagine one of my ranting screeds delivered in person? Quell dommage. I mean, shit, how fucking boring can you be when it has already been done better and much shorter by Jon Stewart.

The other reason why I didn't pay for dinner? I spent all my money on music. Specifically the Georgie James show at the Black Cat on November 16th and the Le Loup (or as some people call them, Los Lobos) show on December 10th. Dibs on the indie rock crush, Billy Pilgrim. Seriously, back off, I'll cut you. Cut you good with wit and stuff because violence is not cool, bro. God do I love coffee? YESH.

As an apology to those bands that I promised to review here...I'm a fucking lazy ass motherfucker who couldn't motivate himself out of a dry paper bag. More on that later.

9 comments:

Brando said...

Doesn't the Nineteenth Amendment exempt men from having to pay for dinner?

Anonymous said...

Totally. Men do NOT have to pay for dinner. Nor do they need to make excuses for not paying.

Chuckles said...

I think you're right, Brando. VON, tell it to the judges (WOMEN) in DC.

I have always viewed some forms dating as this weird socially acceptable prostitution. I have never been on a date with anyone like that, but I have been called deviously romantic and romantically devious. I have also been called deceptively honest.

Anonymous said...

Then I shall call you honestly deceptive. It's the natural progression, correct? Sorry, I don't know about the women in DC, but none of my Chicago friends expect dinner to be bought for them. Maybe you are geographically challenged.

zombie rotten mcdonald said...

Chuck, I'm cool.

Los Lobos is an American Legend, and the coffee thing is.... well, we all have our mind altering substances of choice.

Have you heard the Mountain Goats? Saw them last week, and they put on a great live show, athough way too short.

Anonymous said...

You are one funny motherfucker, and your rants are every bit as innane in person.

Personally I like to go dutch for dinner, but I will always pay for breakfast - one way or another

--rimshot--

Snag said...

So how was the Los Lobos show? Enquiring minds and all that.

Hey, if you're coming out this way, even as far as the good Mr. Pilgrim's, let me know and we can see if there's a place to meet for a beer and a chili dog.

Chuckles said...

Uh, sorry, I guess that was a little misleading, guys. The band's name is Le Loup and they are a DC band. This other band was joking around and calling them Los Lobos at the show I went to in October and...nevermind.

They were awesome.

VON, I am more than geographically challenged, I am graphically challenged.

BP, I have missed the Mountain Goats every time they have been to DC since I first downloaded "Cubs in Five" from You Ain't No Picasso.

mdhatter, you're the funny one and you bring the honies, so you win in that arena as well.

Snag, I will let you know as soon as I know.

Kathleen said...

I too love Chuckles' coffee-hyped rants. I wish I could indulge in them myself, but trying to be healthy and all that nonsense.

I think the paying for dinner thing is a bit tricky. If you invite someone out for dinner, then you are actually inviting her out, (i.e. paying). If you had two tickets to a show, would you invite a date and then at the end say "that'll be $40 please"?

OTOH, I don't like the implications of having my dinner bought for me, then what do you get in return (dinner in my company wasn't enough?) I would always be prepared to split it and see what happens. And if he paid, then I would treat the next time.