I conferred with three sources this weekend and I have learned some things that others should also know.
1: Women are not men. This may seem obvious upon first sight from the beautiful bolus of breastisses and the overall body shape, but it is sometimes not immediately noticed that women are different in other ways as well. They are different in their minds!
2: Women like hugs. This is strange and odd. It is believed that this is related to the above note on women being different in their minds, but more research is needed. Fund me, NIH!
3: Women do not like certain types of jokes. This may be a singular and non-universal trait specifically related to the researcher. More research is needed.