Friday, June 09, 2006

In Dreams I Rage

I had a bad dream last night. I was hanging out in an airport which is never a good sign, but airports are where I spent my formative years. A lot of my friends were there. Some of them had laptops. These people were all playing World of Warcraft. The bad part of the dream is that they all finally convinced me to join the game. I tried to buy a copy but Blizzard said that I also had to buy a copy of Warcraft 3. I told them to shove it up their asses. That's a crap game and I don't want it's disease anywhere near my tablet pc. Its a dream and I can have whatever computer I want. Like an edible carpet computer, if I should so desire. So this fight went on for a while and I ran around the airport kiosk and shredded it like a chimp in a mood. This did not convince the salespeople to let me buy WoW with WC3. Even after I went all proctological on them. So right as I was going to commit serious bodily harm on these schmoes, Tom Hanks and Audrey Tatou went running by and were followed by Ian McKellan.

I recognized where this part of the dream was taking me, so I chased them down and started screaming at them all for accepting parts in a movie based on such a shitty book. Sir McKellan tried to dismiss me as a Christianic fanatic, but I set him straight with a few Magnetos and Mithrandirs. I had to bust out the Olodrin the Wise before he realized that my beliefs run in other directions. This convinced them all that I just hated the book and it's poor writing and exceedingly poor understanding of dualistic religions.

I then found myself running through a WoW setting while being chased by a big box of WC3. Man, does that game suck or what? For that matter, they both suck.

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